How to Reset the Rumble in Your Bedroom—Overcome Disinterest, Boredom, or Lack of Libido With Down-to-Earth Pointers That Will Revive Sexual Desire and Reclaim Intimacy so Your Romantic Relationship Can Thrive Again

How to Revive Your Sex Life

What makes a relationship different from friendship is the deeper levels of intimacy that are shared by the couple. Not only do you spend more time together, but you also express your love for one another through physical passion…between the sheets. But what happens when you just don’t feel the excitement or urge anymore?

First, absolutely nothing is wrong with you! It’s not abnormal at all to find yourself losing sexual interest once you’ve been in a relationship past the ‘honeymoon period’. A myriad of factors could be contributing to this situation from medication and stress to more severe issues such as addiction and hormonal imbalance. Or…you could just be suffering from boredom.

For some, battling an addiction such as masturbation and alcoholism reduces the desire you ought to feel towards your partner. This is due to a psychological change that has you deriving pleasure from other means aside from your spouse. Additionally, stress and depression are also killers to any sexual libido.

As couples grow with time, there’s a tendency for them to find less pleasure in being sexually intimate. Intimacy is derived instead from companionship – spending time together and being there for one another. While this is generally the case for seniors, even young and middle-aged couples can experience this.

Getting Back in the Game

When your sex drive is dampened, there’s a chance that it might negatively affect your relationship (depending on the previous level of sexual activity). For example, if your partner is always rearing to dance under the sheets because there’s been a precedent of a steady four times per week, but now you’re just not interested. Or no matter the effort your partner puts into pleasing you sexually, you just feel numb. When this happens, there’s a likelihood that your partner will feel hurt, inadequate, and in need of sexual intimacy, which you just can’t seem to give. An understanding partner may wait the numbness out, encourage you, or even put in more effort in, but over time even the most determined partner can become frustrated. To avoid damaging your relationship just because your sex drive took a break, you can try these practical tips to ger your ‘sexual-self’ back on track and back in the game.

Kick Habits That Kill Your Sex Drive

If you don’t make some changes, then nothing will change. Stop or significantly reduce smoking, alcohol consumption, masturbation, and substance abuse. They hinder your desire for or ability to have sex. They also alter your brain such that it fails to acknowledge the pleasure derived from sex. These addictive behaviors replace the need for sex with the substitute pleasure derived from them.

Eat Sex-Friendly Fruits and Herbs

What does it hurt to add a few tasty things to your diet that also help your interest in sex? There are fruits known for increasing libido. Bananas are well-known to provide the necessary vitamins to improve the blood flow in your sexual region. Avocados, garlic, figs, and basil are great for increasing your libido so include them where and when you can to maintain or ramp up your drive.  


Even if it is just a brisk walk around the house, get your blood moving. Being unfit has multiple health challenges, and a low sex drive is one of them. You might be unable to sustain the tempo of a sex romp, which tends to ruin a good moment. In order to keep up with sexual demands and revitalize your desire, you need to exercise regularly. Not only does your blood flow increase but you also feel better with the extra serotonin in your system, which will also make you feel more confident.


We know life has an ample amount of chaos, but we are also responsible for what we let stress us out. Stress can diminish desire and completely annihilate your mood. While you can’t utterly shut out stress – either someone gets on your nerves during the day, or you have to deal with a ton of work at the office- you can train yourself to manage it efficiently. Take some time out to sleep, meditate, or do something relaxing. This will help you maintain a stable mood, which will indirectly help you appreciate sex when it comes knocking.

Resolve Conflicts

Don’t let arguments or annoyances fester. When you have misunderstandings with your partner, there’s a high chance that you or your partner won’t immediately be in the mood for sex (unless the heated arguing is something that turns you both on). In order not to allow the disinterest in sex to last too long, settle the conflict between you and your partner. It doesn’t matter who was at fault, what matters more is that you make up with intimacy and connection.


There’s nothing wrong with the way you’ve been having sex for years. But not at least considering some slight or period changes can lead to boredom. Sex can be monotonous and uneventful if you stick to the rudimentary thrusts and kisses alone. When this goes on for too long with zero variety, you might find that you or your partner is slowly losing interest in sex altogether. You can fix this by trying out new sexual or sensual activities. Foreplay is a great way to make your partner want you. Go the extra mile to make sex exciting rather than making it seem like a obligatory chore. Be careful not to try crazy or potentially offensive things without talking to your partner, but it’s ok to spring a new position or a new toy on them without advance permission. Having a sexy chat about what you’d like to try can also unearth some shared fantasies or ideas you’d never explored together before.

Consider More Morning Sex

We can be completely exhausted at the end of a long day, which makes the idea of sex much less alluring. One of the best times for sex is early in the morning when your mind and body are fully rested and when nature comes calling for men, putting that noticeable morning “wood” or erection to good use. But this is only possible if you’ve had enough sleep. Prioritize sleeping early and sleeping enough so that your body can be refreshed and ready for action. Beginning the day with sex also has countless benefits for your stamina and energy throughout the day.

See a Doctor

While no one likes to admit they might need extra help in the arousal department, it is critical to seek out help when conscious efforts aren’t paying off. A low sex drive is based on multiple factors, and there’s no better person to give you the right advice than your doctor. Depending on the factors surrounding your low sex drive, you might receive recommendations ranging from lifestyle choices, sex-enhancing drugs, to relationship counseling. Sex enhancers like viagra are designed to improve libido, but they should only be used when necessary to prevent other types of damage.

Last Words

Sex is a satisfying cherry on the top of your already beautiful relationship. While it’s not all there is to your relationship, it intensifies your bond with your partner. As such, you can’t afford to go without it for too long. When you realize there’s a loss of interest, satisfaction, or enjoyment in your sex life, then it’s time you ramp things up. You definitely won’t regret it!